When my son was two and a half, a local lady here gave swimming lessons to him.  I was stunned after my initial interview with her when she told me she would have him swimming across the pool by the end of two weeks.  However, it turned out to be very true.  I watched for two weeks as she would glide the children through the pool and whisper gently into their ears.  Her calmness would calm their fears.  I used to call her the “child whisperer” because she had a way with every child she came into contact with. 

There was one particular little girl who was about seven or eight who was terrified of the water.  Her whole body would tremble just to get in water up to her ankles.  I had never seen such a fear of water and I wondered if she would be able to learn, but the child whisperer knew just how to handle her.  Each week she would whisper in her ear as she glided her around the pool.  As time went on, she would gently push her underwater to her mother.  Then came the moment when the child whisperer asked the little girl to jump into the water by herself and swim across the pool.  She stood at the edge wanting to jump in, but not having the strength herself.  Suddenly, the child whisperer’s voice cut through the quiet and with a strong intensity she shouted, “Jump!”  Instantly, the little girl jumped into the pool and swam across.  She was swimming alongside my son by the end of two weeks.  That was the only time I had heard the child whisperer raise her voice.

The Bible says that there is a time for everything.  The child whisperer knew that there was a time for gentleness and a time for action and strength.  She had both gentlility and strength and used them at the right times.   I think that her initial gentle manner made her strong side more legitimate later on so that when she called the little girl to action, the little girl trusted her enough to jump into the abyss.  I learned a lot about relationships and trust from that.

I sometimes think that we have lost our civility in our society.  We have become so immersed in the self that we forget about just being gentle and polite when dealing with others.  This weekend, as my husband and I were going into the negotiation process of buying a new car, my husband made an interesting comment.  “The person we deal with has to be nice from the beginning for me.  It’s hard enough to go through this process, and if the person is a polite person, it is going to be an easier process.”  I couldn’t agree more. 

Civility is only a start.  Getting personal requires going to the next level and we won’t ever get to the next level if we don’t start with civility.  Our fast food culture teaches us that we should demand what we want and we should demand it be here fast.  As consumers, if we don’t get it fast and perfect, we complain at the top of our lungs.  Jesus taught a different philosophy.  He taught us to let the other guy go first.  He told us that if someone takes our coat, we should give them our cloak as well.   If someone asks us to walk a mile with them, we should walk two miles with them. 

I’ve always felt that the voice of God is a whisper.  He gently guides us through our lives with a gentle whisper in our ear, but it takes more effort to hear a whisper and maybe that’s why we pay attention more.  We are used to noises of our world and so the sound of a quiet whisper is worth listening to.