I frequently go to Panera’s – and interact with many of the same people each time I’m there – I try to connect with most of them – but not all of them are open to it…and then there are the ones I do connect with…Michael was at another Panera’s close to where I used to work – like 3 years ago. Recently, he suddenly appeared at the one near my home – he greeted me as a long lost friend. To the others, I am still only a customer.

Perhaps to Juan, you were only a customer.

We’ll never know if the course of Juan’s life would have been altered by anything you (or anyone else) might have done differently. I personally doubt it. People take their own lives quite unexpectedly, and suicide is the ultimate irrational act (counter to the incredibly strong survival instinct). There is simply no way to make sense of suicide, but we can’t help wondering.

But then, I don’t think averting a suicide is the point you are so powerfully making here. The point is to simply connect with people in meaningful and doable ways so that, perhaps, if they feel safe enough with us, they will share some of their life and struggle with us. This may not change them at all, but it changes US. And it helps us become a beacon of hope to those we come into contact with very naturally each week.

Thank you for sharing (so vulnerably) your story.

I am so sad to hear about Juan

Yes, please don’t blame yourself

And, yes, let us become interested in those around us

A phrase I’ve heard… be kind to everyone because you never know what they’re going through… it’s true… I’m so often surprised at what people are going through and how important it is to demonstrate and embody grace

May Christ bring you comfort, April

Peace, Tim