by April Terry (personal blog http://faithwarming.blogspot.com)

Trust is an interesting thing.  Sometimes, trust comes automatically between two people and sometimes it is built up over a number of years.  It can be damaged in a heartbeat never to return or it can endure through all manner of trials and against all odds.  The bottom line:  Trust is a choice.

Years ago, I met a friend at work and she trusted me instantly.  To this day, I don’t know why she did and it made me a little uncomfortable at first because it was so instant.  I kept a little something back because I didn’t know how to react, but after a while, she won me over and now I can say that I’m glad that she did.  She is a wonderful friend.    On the other hand, I had another friend who confessed a secret after consuming a lot of alcohol and then, in the light of day never wanted to speak about it again.  I carried her secret with me and never told a soul, but I don’t know if our relationship could continue because she was always worried that I would tell someone.  I never did.

Some people are quick to trust and others are slow to it.  In any relationship, trust is always my goal because I believe that trust is the key to moving on to the really important things in life.  So, I work to build trust in others.  I cultivate it one conversation at time.

However, I belive that I am also a person that can be trusted as well.  If I weren’t a trustworthy person, it would be harder to build those relationships.  If I couldn’t keep the personal things that people tell me personal, then all my efforts to build relationships that are built on trust are worthless.  I have had to learn to be a person who can be trusted in order to have trusting relationships because it did not come naturally to me.

Personally, I am open and transparent to most of those people I meet.  This is because I don’t have secrets of my own to harbor.  Because of that, I am able to share my own thoughts and ideas on anything in my life without holding back.  I think that if that weren’t so, others would take much longer to trust me.  Thankfully, my own transparency seems to give others the green light to open up and be transparent themselves.  I haven’t always been that way, really.  I have found that since I have grown in my relationship with Christ, I have matured in my personal relationships as well. 

Jesus looked up in a tree and saw a man named Zacchaeus up there trying to get a good look.  He announced to him that he would be dining at Zacchaeus’ house that very evening.  To some, that seemed like a crazy thing to do.  After all, Zacchaeus wasn’t exactly known to be a great guy. 
He was wealthy and it was off the backs of those he had collected taxes from, but Jesus saw into the heart of this man and because Jesus didn’t hesitate with Zacchaeus, Zacchaeus trusted him immediately and completely.  He let Jesus know that he was going to make right all the wrong that he had committed.  That’s the kind of trust that built an instant relationship between Jesus and Zacchaeus and that’s the kind of trust that we need to learn and explore.

Trust is a choice, and to be trusted, we must also be a trustworthy person.  This is the recipe that most relationships are built upon.  If we choose to have loving, trusting relationships, we must be open and willing to bare our hearts while at the same time safekeeping the soul-baring details that are being shared in the heat of the friendship.  It’s an act of love that we don’t always examine or talk about, but it’s just as important as being nice or doing good deeds for others.  Trust is not just choosing to trust others, although that’s important, but also choosing to be a person who should be trusted as well.  Of all the character traits that we strive for, being a person who can be trusted may very well be one of the most important.  I want to be a trusted friend, not just a friend.